Continuing to pursue my weight loss goals I took a (fast) walk this evening. 10 kilometers in 1.5 hours. A little slower than my target of seven kilometers per hour, but it will do for today.
And I got to enjoy an absolutely stupendously beautiful sunset as well…
If you could ask me any question what would it be? About me, about male escorts, about the industry, about a date with me, or something else?
Drop a comment below, email john@john-oh-escort.com, or text 0437 520 539 and I’ll do my best to answer it for you.
So I have a few questions that have come in overnight. Thank you to everyone who contributed! I’ll add more questions and answers as they arrive.
Here are a couple to get started, but you can read them all here.
Q. What happens if you don’t find me attractive?
A. In the thirteen years I have been working as a male escort this has never happened. No, all of my clients are not super models! Most of my clients are normal women with all of the variety of looks and body type that comes with.
I am extremely lucky though that I really only meet decent people who are respectful of me and I can make a connection with. I think that this comes in large part from the fact that the vast majority of women who book with me take the time to read a lot of my posts here on this website and in doing so they get a clear picture of who I, what I value, and what I offer. The women who choose to see me generally share my values and therein lies the key – if we can get along and have fun together out of bed, then that for me is the foundation of attraction in bed.
Q. Is sex work legal?
A. The answer to that question is “it depends”. Australia is one the most progressive nations in the world when it comes to sex work. New Zealand is as well, but they were a bit slower off the mark!
The bottom line is that here in New South Wales in Australia (and Victoria, The Australian Capital Territory, and the Northern Territory) sex work is decriminalised – meaning that it is treated like any other job and not regulated in any way specific to sex work (there are minor exceptions to this but they won’t effect you as a client).
Queensland, Tasmania, and Western Australia all allow sex work, but it is regulated or or less harshly in those states. South Australia remains the only state to effectively criminalise any form of sex work (South Australia needs to do better).
Q. Do the interactions with clients feel transactional?
A. No they don’t feel that way for me and I do my level best to make sure that they don’t feel that way for my clients. I like to be informal, to chat and have fun together. I treat every booking like I’m on a date with someone I’ve just met and am looking forward to getting to know better.
Q. Do you talk dirty to your clients? Do you mind if a woman wants you to talk dirty to her?
A. Dirty talk can be a fun part of sex – if that is something that works for you! I have no problem with being asked to talk dirty and will happily oblige, but it’s not something I will initiate as not everyone likes or wants it. So please feel free to ask!
Read all the questions and answers here!
Continue readingThere are plenty of pitfalls for couples wanting to try a threesome. Here’s a short list to help you have the best experience possible:
So that is a short list that I think about and discuss with your partner if you are planning on trying a threesome. And if you are ready then drop me a line and lets have some consensual fun!
John
P.S. I looked for a stock photo that I could use for this article, since I haven’t ever taken any “threesome” relevant photos – and boy does the internet have opinions about threesomes and what they look like (almost always two women and one man). I always enjoy seeing men secure and comfortable enough in themselves and their relationship to be ready to make their partner the focus of a threesome rather than themselves.
I’m pretty comfortable with my body – extremely comfortable really. I am lucky to have been pretty healthy my entire life and had the opportunity and inclination to exercise and participate in sports.
However over time everyone’s metabolism slows and we are inclined to put on weight. I’m no exception and it’s something that I have worked hard at over the years to manage.
Another aspect that I wasn’t expecting is that in recent times I have developed a lot more upper body mass – muscle. When I was in my thirties I was always lean and very light. It was a real advantage for me when I was rock climbing on faces that were not an overhang (where absolute strength really comes into play and having a low centre of gravity isn’t so important). It was also good for me when I was cycling and running.
Then about ten years ago for no reason that I know of my body decided that upper body muscle was new goal and my shoulders and arms filled out. I’ll never be “big” like some men are, which I’m very happy about honestly, but I’m a lot more solid and stronger than I once was.
The last few years of physical work required by the business that I started during the pandemic has only built on those gains and I have to say that I remain very happy with my body in general.
However. I am not overly happy with my bodies more recent propensity to build up it’s fat reserves. So it’s time for some directed action to reverse the trend.
As someone who is tall and relatively broad, I can put on ten kilograms and it is not particularly noticeable, which is a trap. It’s easy to ignore how my body is changing, especially since it’s only gradual. But enough is enough. It’s time for action.
I’m not going to tell anyone how to lose weight. Your personal history, medical issues, food culture that you grew up with etc are all going to effect what does and doesn’t work for you – this isn’t medical advice of any sort! For me what I know is this: carbohydrates are my enemy – and as someone who loves few things more than rice, pasta, potatoes (in all their forms), and bread (I literally ran a bakery once), that’s a real blow.
I know that if I am going to lose some weight and keep it off then I need to be significantly reducing, or better yet eliminating carbohydrates from my diet.
So that’s what I’ve done. Along with reducing my eating to two meals per day, implementing intermittent fasting (I eat my two meals at 1.00pm and 5.00pm), increasing my exercise, increased my water intake, and supplementing electrolytes, magnesium (which I’m always low on and leads to muscle fatigue), B group vitamins, and a multi-vitamin.
Here’s what’s happened so far:
More importantly though I can see the change in my body when I look in the mirror and I like where it’s going. To anyone reading this – please don’t feel that this post is making any demands on you. It’s nothing more than my personal journey to reach a body shape that I am happy with that lets me do the things that I want to do. I see women of all shapes and sizes and I enjoy all of your bodies!
I hope that for anyone undertaking, or considering their own weight loss journey that it might be helpful and provide some inspiration.
John
A client messaged me recently and (with her permission) I want to share some of what she said.
“I do truly believe that my experience with you has taken a whole heap of weight off … I know how I want to be treated and respected”
That perhaps is the most important part of any sex worker’s job – to be what the other person needs when they need it. As a male sex worker for women I meet a lot of women who aren’t seeing me just because they feel like having sex. Often seeing me is a stepping stone to getting back into dating, or a break from the complications and disappointments of dating. Or a safe way to re-engage with their sexuality after a long period without sex, or after some sort of trauma.
Lets be clear – I’m not a miracle worker. I don’t have any secrets to getting over the bad things that have happened in a person’s life. I’m just a person with some physical skills and experience and a willingness to listen and prioritise another person’s needs.
And I think that actually goes a long, long way for many people who are tired of everything being conditional and feeling that they have to fight even for a little pleasure and comfort.
John
This video popped up in my YouTube feed today and I thought I might share it. It’s by a woman who has a lower leg amputation and she discusses her journey with her sexuality after her amputation. I have enjoyed her discussion of disability in general, but this one about sex and disability in particular. You can watch the video here:
I have been working with women with disabilities for as long as I have been a male escort for women. I believe that people with disabilities having access to sex workers is an important social service that allows them to experience their lives more fully.
If you live in Australia and have a disability, or are assisting someone who does then the first thing for you to do is contact Touching Base (https://www.touchingbase.org/). From their website:
Touching Base Inc is a charitable organisation, based in Sydney NSW Australia, that has been active since October 2000. Touching Base developed out of the need to assist people with disability and sex workers to connect with each other, focusing on access, discrimination, human rights and legal issues and the attitudinal barriers that these two marginalised communities can face.
https://www.touchingbase.org/
They do great work and have a referral list of sex workers to suit a wide range of needs, trained in working with people with disabilities. I highly recommend them.
John
I talked more than once about labiaplasty and how – unless there is a genuine medical reason for it – that no woman needs to worry about the appearance of her labia. Well, apparently, post covid (and young men watching waaaay too much porn) there is a crisis in male confidence that has caused many, many men to go under the knife to have penis “enhancement” surgery (see the article Penile Cosmetic Surgery is Booming, But… Does Size Really Matter?” from the Sunday Telegraphy Body + Soul, October 15, 2023)
It shouldn’t need to be said. It really shouldn’t. But sadly it does.
Men: except in the most extreme situation – the size of your penis – does. Not. MATTER!
To put penis size in perspective: just 0.6 percent of people who have a penis have what is considered a “micro-penis” (defined as the stretched length between the tip and the base of the gently stretch penis on the body side of less than 9.32 cm (3.67 in.)).
That’s only just above one in two hundred people have a “micro penis” – and even that definition doesn’t mean that the owner can’t enjoy sex or that a woman cant get pleasure from it!
But apparently this message has been lost to the fire hose of internet porn featuring massive cocks. And young men are going under the knife – encouraged by advertising from a cosmetic surgery industry that uses highly manipulative tactics to attack men’s self confidence.
Now, if this were a consequence and risk free procedure, then that would be one thing. But it’s not. There are now surgeons who spend significant amounts of time operating to rectify botched penile surgery!
So men – here are some things that are much worse than having anxiety about the size of your penis:
Not to mention the approximately $15,000 cost.
If you do have anxiety about the size of your penis then here’s a better solution: talk to a psychologist about it. Spend some of that $15,000 on therapy so you can find a way to be happy with what you have.
Finally – I remember seeing a video of a female American porn star talking about what was ideal for her in a partner. Her preference: four inches – that’s 10.1 centimeters. That’s literally only just bigger than a “micro-penis” – and for her – a former porn star – it was ideal.
John
So today I learned that as women age the nerves in their clitoris that detect soft touch can deteriorate and degrade a woman’s ability to feel soft and gentle stimulation. However – there is another type of nerve that detects strong stimulation like vibration that is more durable and less likely to be damaged over time.
This is good news for women who through the process of aging find themselves less able to enjoy soft, gentle stimulation. Vibrators exist and it’s ok to use one and enjoy the results.
I learned this very useful information from this article:
https://www.aarpethel.com/health/why-would-a-doctor-prescribe-a-vibrator
I think that it is worth a read for any woman who finds herself in this situation, experiencing a loss of sensation as she gets older.
There is an addendum to add here though!
If you use a very strong vibrator and you use it a lot and you find that it is becoming less effective – then it’s time to dial it down and reset your responsiveness. Very strong stimulation will cause your body and brain to react and “turn down the volume”. It’s not permanent and is easy enough to reset by lowering the stimulation level and letting your body adjust to the new, lower level of stimulation.
John
I recently had a booking with a woman who I have known as a client for several years. I hadn’t seen her in over a year and was pleasantly surprised when she contacted me again. While chatting on the couch over a glass of wine she described to me the ups and downs of dating some men on and off over the last year. There had been some successes and some failures, but on the whole, enough successes that she hadn’t felt the need to come and see me.
However an experience with a new date changed her mind. He left her feeling a little worried about his trustworthiness and that got her thinking – “Do I take the risk? Or do I not?”.
Ultimately she decided not to take the risk – and part of the reason why was that she knew that she could simply come to see me instead. Which she did.
I think that this is a really important lesson – it’s good to have an option so that you don’t succumb to “fear of missing out”, whether you exercise that option or not, just knowing that it’s there can help to make better decisions.
As per the title of this post – if you know that you can reliably get the intimacy and sex that you want and need (from someone like me) then you don’t have to “settle”.
John
Disclaimer – I am not a doctor. Please don’t take anything I say here as medical advice. Check with your doctor before you make any decisions about using antidepressants.
Over the years I have met a lot of women who have been taking SSRI antidepressants (selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitors). Many of them have, as a side effect, found it either very difficult, or impossible to reach orgasm while taking these medication – and the effects don’t just disappear as soon as you stop taking an SSRI, it can take time and may leave you experiencing sexual stimulation differently.
Everyone has to make the decision that is right for them about the medication that they take, whether they can accept the side effects given the benefits etc. My problem is that doctors seem to down play, or not explain – or possibly not even know – many of the side-effects of the medications that they are prescribing.
In the case of SSRI’s I believe that the effects on sexual function are seen as virtually irrelevant by many doctors and are rarely explained. You could reasonably say that treating the symptoms of depression, which can be very serious, are more important than a woman being able to have an orgasm. But that is treating depression in a very narrow way and in my opinion overlooks the benefits of a healthy sex life.
SSRIs tend to smooth out emotional swings, preventing the huge dips and also preventing the highs, but it should also be recognised that taking away what is a very intimate pleasure – being able to achieve orgasm – can be extremely distressing.
We shouldn’t – in my opinion – be sacrificing one thing for another – or, at the very least, making sure that people are *fully* aware of the consequences of taking the medication that they are being prescribed before they start to take it.
John