Category Archives: Oral sex

Ali Wong on oral sex

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@kasinger_family

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♬ original sound – Jennifer Prentice

Ali Wong is pretty funny (you can look her up on Netflix and Youtube) and I can totally understand her position on oral sex and refusing to trade in her husband. It’s hard finding a man who’s good at oral sex. It is really hard! And I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that, because most women I meet tell me exactly that.

Oral sex has been something of a speciality for me for all of my adult life and I cannot for the life of me understand why men who like having sex with women and wish that more women would have sex with them, don’t make it their mission to give the best oral sex they possibly can!

I mean come on guys – it’s a crowd pleaser. You may not be tall dark and hansom, well hung, wealthy and connected, or whatever cliché is meant to make us attractive, but if you can give a woman good oral, that’s going to leave an impression.

And seriously – if you are going to expect her to give you oral – then it’s only polite to give as good (or better) than you get.

It’s not hard. But it takes effort. It may not be a favourite thing to do (which I really don’t understand personally), but why wouldn’t you put yourself out for your partner’s pleasure?

John.

Too many women have never experienced oral sex

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It happened again. I met a woman who had never experienced oral sex from a partner. Not just “never had good oral sex” – but “never had it ever”.

How – in the twenty first century is this possible?

Men – I’m looking at you – you need to do better.

I mean the whole “I-want-a-blowjob-from-you-but-I’m-not-prepared-to-reciprocate” hypocrisy is bad enough. But to have never even tried it – not once – is unforgivable as a sexual being – as a man (I’m pretty sure that lesbians and bi women have this covered). We are well past the “vaginas are scary and full of magic” stage of human social evolution. We all know that oral sex is perfectly safe and healthy and normal to do.

So why aren’t more men making good oral sex skills a priority in their sex lives? I don’t have an answer to this question. I am perplexed.

I love giving oral sex. If I have a “kink” then that is probably it. I personally find it very arousing, and derive great pleasure and satisfaction from giving a woman oral sex – and hopefully an orgasm if that is what she wants.

Not all men share my enthusiasm apparently.

Which is a loss for their partners – but also for them! If you don’t give oral sex then that’s something that you yourself are missing out on, along with your partner. It’s another thing that you can share with your partner. It makes the range of sexual experiences that are possible greater. Isn’t that an excellent thing for every one?

And it may just get you a blowjob in return… I mean that’s got to be worth some investment, right?

At the end of the day I guess that this just highlights how limited many men’s view of sex is. It honestly makes me sad – for the women who don’t get the sex that they want and need to be happy and fulfilled and for the men who are living with impoverished sex lives.

We can do better as a society if we are prepared to have real conversations (and education) about sex.

John.

Help for couples with no sex experience – guidance and instruction about massage, touch, tantra, mutual oral, virginity, and more

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Not everyone who gets married has the sexual confidence and experience that they might like to have. It’s quite common for younger couples especially. Perhaps you come from a conservative culture and background, perhaps you just never had the chance to learn. It doesn’t matter how it happened – and it doesn’t mean you have to live with not knowing.

For many years now I have offered lessons to single women to help teach them about their body and help them explore their sexuality. I have also occasionally seen couples with similar needs, but I haven’t really written about this before and I thought that I should.

So here’s the bottom line – if you are a couple and one or both of you are inexperienced with sex (or even never had sex at all) then I can help you with practical instruction. I’m not a therapist who will just talk to you about what to do. As a straight male sex worker for women, I can provide practical experience in any area that you want to explore and gain confidence in. I can guide you and your partner through all of the things that you want to learn. I can demonstrate techniques (like how to give great oral sex to each other) showing both of you what works and how to learn about what each other likes. I can answer any questions that you have but don’t know who and how to ask.

My courses generally start with the simplest thing of all: touch. It can be literally just touching your partner’s body, it can be massage – which is a great way to explore and arouse your partner, it can be more sophisticated and sensual like intimate touch. I can show you all of these things and you can practice them with me and get feedback about how you are doing and improve your skills.

An extension of touch is oral sex. It’s an excellent way for a man to help his female partner to reach orgasm if she has trouble doing so through other means. I am very skilled in this area and can teach a man all of the techniques that he needs to be able to satisfy his partner. Conversely, I can show a woman how to touch her partner’s penis and teach her the techniques that make for great oral sex for him.

Are you a couple, newly married, and want to learn how to give each other erotic massage? I can help you with that. I can teach you how to give a massage that starts out relaxing and enjoyable, then builds up to sensual, creating lots of sexual tension and getting you both ready for some great sex…

Some couples are even in the position where one or both of them are virgins – have never experienced penetrative sex. I have met a couple from India in this situation in the past. This can be very stressful for both of you, but it’s a situation that I have been in many times and I can show you how to have sex for the first time without it being painful and help you to learn to make it great.

Techniques like tantra are especially good for couples to allow them to connect deeply and to make the sex that you have last as long as you want and to make it very satisfying. I can show you these things too.

Once you have the basics worked out, you might want to learn and experience more. If that’s the case, then I can help with that too. Advanced positions for sex, games like spanking, blindfolds, light BDSM. Anything that you can think of, I can help with practical guidance and instruction.

There is so much to explore for new couples and couples new to sex and I can be your guide. Safe. Knowledgeable. Discreet.

You can drop me a text, or email, or call me any time to discuss with no obligation and no risk.

John.

OMGyes and learning about women’s pleasure

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I was asked recently by someone with a teenage daughter if I new of any good online resources for girls to learn about sex, sexuality, and pleasure and it reminded me of a site that I was shown by a friend a couple of years ago. It took me a little while with google to find it again, but I managed to track it down – so I thought I should share it here as well.

It’s called OMGyes – http://omgyes.com

So what is it? From the site:

The distilled wisdom of 20,000 women, ages 18-95

Scientific studies conducted in partnership with Indiana University and Kinsey Institute researchers

and

For Women, Men, and Couples

OMGyes is for everyone who cares about women’s sexual pleasure and wants to make it even better

So it’s a website that contains lots of information about sexuality and how women can experience pleasure. But the really clever part is that it includes interactive tutorials that let you (on a tablet, phone, or computer) actually practice what you are learning about. For instance if you are learning about clitoral stimulation, then you have an interactive tool that lets you (on a tablet or phone) use your finger to experiment with playing with a woman’s clitoris as described. The system gives you feedback on how well you are doing it.

As someone who has spent much of my career in IT and as a male escort for women I was genuinely suprised by how good the site and particularly the learning tools are.

I would highly recommend it for anyone – male, female, or other – who want to learn about female pleasure.

Here’s an introductory video from OMGyes on Youtube that is safe for work…

Western societies are, in general, very reticent about talking about sex, let alone about sexual pleasure, so I think that this website and it’s tools are a breath of fresh air. I think that anyone (even me) can benefit from this information and I intend to revisit it again over the next week or two. If you are here on my website, then it’s likely that you too could learn something fun and enjoyable at OMGyes so I highly recommend having a look at it.

BTW – I am not sponsored by OMGyes, I just like the site and the information that they provide.

John.

All about sex – a writing project

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In my recent post about sex education I suggested that it was time for me to write something on the topic.

In the last few weeks I have started on this project and am delighted to say that it is progressing well.  My intention is to publish parts of the book here as they are completed, or at least knocked into a reasonable shape.  I expect that it will be an ongoing project that evolves over time as I get feedback and more experience with the process and subject.

So.  Stay tuned.

John.

Laser hair removal

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A couple of weeks ago I decided to shave myself below the waist line (no not the legs – mine are already naturally almost hair free).  It’s almost the norm of course for women to do this, but most guys don’t give it much though.  I haven’t for many years, but decided it was time for something different.

The results of more smooth skin available to be touched was in a word fabulous for me and generated significant complements too!  So all in all it was a positive change.  Then the re-growth, itching, and ingrown hairs began.  I hadn’t forgotten about this, but it focused my attention.  The new style was such a success that I want to keep it, so the logical solution was to get serious and make it “permanent” with laser removal.

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Sex Tips for Busy People, by Jacqueline Hellyer

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I love and enjoy sex.  A good thing given that I am a male escort for women.  Not everyone does – both men and women.  But most do.

Unfortunately our society often conspires to force us out of doing the things that are really conducive to wanting and having good sex.  The Sydney Morning Herald published an article recently about the book Sex Tips for Busy People, by Jacqueline Hellyer here:

www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/life/how-to-have-gourmet-sex-20120315-1v77z.html

The conclusions drawn in the article and book about how to revitalise your sex life centre around simple practical things.  Like making time that’s dedicated to sex, going to bed early, talking to your partner, being nice to each other.

These are things that my partner and I do as a matter of course, but as I said at the beginning, people’s lives ofte conspire against being able to do this stuff.  Stress, limited time, work, family pressures, and just the familiarity that a long term relationship brings can make it really hard to do these simple things.

The article uses the analogy of good sex being like a gourmet meal: it takes time and effort to prepare and as a result is more enjoyable and special because of that effort.  Which gave me a chuckle as (if you continue the analogy) you could consider that booking a date with me is like going to a good restaurant.  You don’t have to do the preparation and cooking, but you still get the great meal.

The life lesson though is that if you want good sex, you (both) have to work for it.  I am all in favor of that and it is one of the reasons that I offer my Masterclasses in oral sex.  Not everyone can afford my services on a regular basis, so I wanted to be able to give couples and singles a few more skills to help things along.

The more we think about our sex life, work at giving to our partner the better.  Sometimes it can’t, or won’t be reciprocated, but it’s definitely worth a try!

John.

Ten Minutes To Orgasm movie – Update

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I have just had a quick look at the download statistics for my movie Ten Minute To Orgasm.  What can I say but OH WOW.

In the seven days since I posted the video it has been downloaded over 100,000 times.

That is simply stupendous,  I am lost for words …

My website traffic has gone up by more than an order of magnitude.  Lucky the server can handle it.

I think that I will just say “thank you” and leave it at that.

John.