My fellow sex worker and acquaintance Lucie Bee recently made a post on Twitter about a different and entertaining web comic of sex toy reviews (and more).
It’s called: Oh Joy Sex Toy and it is a bit of fun for a rainy afternoon. Or to give you some insight into the pros and cons of various sex toys. I like it. It’s a different approach to toy reviews and web comics alike.
John.
Once again, it has been a long year, sometimes hard, but also filled with wonderful clients and new adventures.
I want to thank everyone for their contribution, for the fun, the great sex, the conversations shared, and the company. I am very lucky to meet the women and couples who I do. In every sense, you make my work and life possible.
So, thank you all. I hope you have a fun and safe holiday, and I look forward to 2016 and hopefully seeing you then!
John.
I noticed an article in the Sydney Morning Herald today that looked great. The headline is “Sex, disability, and humor”. That’s really good I thought. Too often people with disabilities are seen as asexual, or unable to enjoy, or uninterested in sex. This isn’t the case, and is more likely to be a reflection of the person’s own ignorance, or fear of sex and sexuality.
So great! Here’s an article to help dispel that myth. And it was good as far as that goes. However the final paragraph left me staggered. It said:
“Unfortunately, no comparable organisations or publications exist in Australia – yet!”
This is absolutely not true. As a sex worker who works with Touching Base and women with disabilities, I can tell you that there absolutely IS an organisation that helps people with disabilities explore and enjoy their sexuality. It’s Touching Base. From their website:
Touching Base Inc is a charitable organisation, based in Sydney NSW Australia, that has been active since October 2000. Touching Base developed out of the need to assist people with disability and sex workers to connect with each other, focusing on access, discrimination, human rights and legal issues and the attitudinal barriers that these two marginalised communities can face.
It’s disappointing that the article failed to mention Touching Base. Really disappointing. I don’t know if this oversight is deliberate, but hopefully it will be corrected in the future.
John.
I wasn’t aware of Gordons Bay until I stumbled across it in the paper today. It’s a nice find with what looks to be a long hot summer on the way.
I love the ocean and snorkeling, so I think that this might be on my list of things to do this summer (perhaps more than once).
It has an underwater “nature trail” marked by chain between concrete blocks to lead you around the bay. It really does sound like a fun experience. You can read more about it here:
http://randwickcitytourism.com.au/sights/gordons_bay.html
If you would like to try this with me, then drop me an email or text and we can do it together.
John.
One of my favourite moments in the day is taking off my clothes and slipping into bed. I have slept naked since my teens. I hated the feeling of being tied up in pajamas, and even the constriction of briefs, was never comfortable for me. And that was long before I had the pleasure of sharing my bed with a woman.
It’s nice now to read an article like this one:
http://www.msn.com/en-au/health/medical/heres-why-you-should-be-sleeping-naked/ar-AAeECX7?li=AAabC8j
[This article has since been removed by MSN – but there are plenty of newer articles online that discuss the health benefits of sleeping naked]
and learn that there are quantifiable physical and mental health benefits.
That’s all great. But it points to the larger issue that our society chooses to ignore – that is, our health and well being is dependent upon many things, like good sleep, eating well, exercising, lowering stress – and yes, having physical intimacy with another person.
If I go back through my blog I am sure that I have written about this issue more than once already, but it’s worth doing it again I think.
Western culture has us focusing on goals like career, wealth, marriage, and possessions, tangible things that are easy to quantify and hard to deny. But my experience is that the things that make me and many other people happy are far less tangible. Caring, willing physical contact from another person is one of those things. We are taught not to value it, to even treat it as dirty or wrong. But the truth is that it’s both natural and at the end of the day necessary for our health.
Sadly it is often the first thing that gets pushed aside when external pressures like work and family begin to pile up. And it’s understandable that we may not feel like sex when we go to bed. Sex takes energy (physical and emotional), but sleeping naked, kissing your partner, cuddling them, holding them close skin to skin in bed does not. It’s worth remembering and (pardon the pun) embracing.
John.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I don’t have much in the way of whiskers, in fact I couldn’t grow a beard to save myself. However, what I do have still needs regular shaving, and along with few whiskers I also have quite soft and sensitive skin.
As a result, shaving (with anything other than the sharpest razor) is likely to result in not the closest shave, and plenty of razor burn. My face is smarting a little just at the thought.
Commercial shaving foams are an effective solution, preventing the burn and giving a closer shave, but I have never really liked the idea of buying pressure packed foam just to shave a bit of stubble. It seems wasteful, and I have no idea what they put in the stuff.
However my soap making friend Chelsea (of Cherry Blossom Soap Company), recently gave me a sample of her new hand made shaving soap. I was skeptical, but decided to give it a go.
The results: I am really quite surprised and delighted with this soap. It gives a soft, slippery lather that allows the razor to really glide over the skin. I get a very close shave, and almost no razor burn. In a word, I am impressed well beyond my expectations.
And I am sure that it would be just as good for shaving legs and bikini-lines as it is for my chin!
You can buy Chelsea’s shaving bar here:
http://cherryblossomsoap.com.au/2015/06/shaving-soap/
It gets my stamp of approval.
This gallery contains 6 photos.
With special thanks to my friend K, for suggesting this location and shooting the photos. I am in your debt.
It’s been a long time coming, but finally my (almost) new 2004 Triumph Daytona is back on the road. After some very un-hilarious mixups over some repairs that it required everything is sorted out, fitted, adjusted, tuned, and fixed. Now I just need some good weather!
If you would like to take a ride with me one day, just drop me a line. It would be my pleasure.
John.
Everyone loves boobs. I most certainly do. Big, small, it doesn’t matter. They are a panacea – they make me feel happy when I am sad, let me forget my pain when touched, and arouse passion in the heat of the moment. They truly are fabulous.
For many women though, they are a – literal – burden. Any woman with really big boobs will know the problems – back ache, the discomfort of wearing a bra, the pain of sport. The pain of trying to have a conversation without your boobs being stared at.
So. Many women opt for reduction surgery. It is something that I see a surprising amount of in my work. There are a lot of women in this country who are opting for it. The Sydney Morning Herald recently ran an article by Jo Hartley about it here…
It is her personal story of the experience of growing up to have a 34F bust, how that effected her life, and how transforming it was to have reduction surgery that reduced her bust to a more manageable 34D.
I expect that most women would be nervous, even fearful of having surgery on such a sensitive part of their body. It’s understandable. Not just the fear of the surgery itself and the risk of something going wrong, but of the results. Will they still look ok? Will they still be sensitive? All reasonable questions, and if you are considering this surgery, well worth talking to your doctor about before going ahead.
For my part, I can say that I have seen the results of many reduction surgeries and the vast majority are really very good. Some so good that I didn’t even notice until it was pointed out to me.
There are risks of course with any kind of surgery, but if your breasts are making your life difficult and painful, then I think that it is well worth considering.
John.
In amongst the outrage, fear, and moral grandstanding over the Ashley Madison user database leak I came across this article:
It is about the most sensible and humane piece of journalism that I have ever read. In answer to the question: “should I look up the database to see if X is on it” the author just say “no, leave it alone”. There is wisdom here.
Women come to me for many reasons, some, because they cannot get the sexual satisfaction that they desire in their lives from their partners. Some do it with the partners knowledge and permission. Some do not.
But “cheating” isn’t the problem here. “Cheating”, with all of its derogatory overtones is what happens when we live in a society that is dysfunctional in how it handles sex and relationships. Why do people “cheat”? Some because they can. Some because they feel that they have no other option.
What we need to do as a society is collectively “grow up”. In an ideal world, there would be no need for a service like mine. But the truth is that there is no genuine attempt to teach children, teenagers, and young adults how to develop and maintain functional relationships, let alone give people space and acceptance as they work out what their sexuality is and what they need in their lives. We can’t even allow – in this country – that two people of the same sex can have a genuine functional relationship.
We are trapped in a social narrative that starts with fairy tales and “ends” with white weddings. Then we have to live the rest of our lives trying to live up to this impossibly high standard of happiness and reliance on one other person. In short, it’s impossible for most people. Just look at divorce rates. And just because people are still married doesn’t mean that they are happy and fulfilled, or wouldn’t like something more or different.
Which brings us full circle to Ashley Madison. It’s time that we left our moral outrage at the door. Recognised that people and relationships are complex, that judging others by our own morality is wrong and destructive, and that we need a new order in our lives that prioritises real human needs and wants, rather than religious dogma and social etiquette that is demonstratively harmful.
Recognising same sex marriage would be a good start, but a rethink of even the concept of marriage would be even better.
John.