It’s time to write the post that needs to be written.
My first post about Orgasmic Meditation was on the whole positive. Since then I have attended one of their training courses (fun) and come to realise that the concepts behind OM are powerful, beneficial, and something that every woman and man should know about and understand. And preferably practice! I have used orgasmic meditation (or variations of it) with a number of my clients with success. My partner has declared that it is “ridiculously enjoyable” and that it has been transformative for our sex life (you are never too old to learn new ways to enjoy sex!).
So, orgasmic meditation gets a big tick. I highly recommend that you learn about it, perhaps attend one of their courses, join their online community if you need to find someone to do it with. And start enjoying being stroked!
There is however, in my opinion, one thing that you need to do first: THROW AWAY YOUR VIBRATOR!
Why? It’s this simple: vibrators are too powerful. They train your brain to be LESS sensitive to clitoral stimulation. They take away your ability to engage with and enjoy your body and the most specific pleasure that you can enjoy, that is stimulation of your clit.
When you try orgasmic meditation you will understand why. The whole technique is based around the lightest, most gentle touch possible of the woman’s clitoris. By contrast using a vibrator is like putting too much salt on your food. In the end you can only taste salt and you lose the ability to enjoy the subtle flavours and variations of unsalted food. Like wise, your vibrator is destroying your connection with your clit. Let me explain how. I read a recent study summarised here:
http://www.cell.com/current-biology/abstract/S0960-9822(14)01487-0
It showed that regular fine detail work with fingers – including playing musical instruments, or using a smart phone – resulted in greater brain activity in the areas of the brain related to sensing touch. I.e. when you use your finger tips to do something that requires a delicate touch, your brain responds by ramping up it’s sensitivity to the signals coming from that part of your body.
Your clitoris has upward of 8000 nerve endings, all packed into a tiny space. It is exquisitely receptive – more so than even your fingertips. But what you “feel” is dependent up whether or not your brain is “listening” to the signals properly. Extrapolating from the finding of the study mentioned above, it is reasonable to expect that using a vibrator, especially a powerful one for clitoral stimulation will allow your brain to become less attuned to the signals from you clit. After all, if you were extremely sensitive, then it could actually be painful to have that level of stimulation, so your body dials down the sensitivity progressively.
So. Orgasmic meditation – through the use of very, very gentle stimulation of the clitoris with the finger tip – should, I believe, result in an increase in brain activity and hence sensation and pleasure that a woman feels, in the same way that smart phone, or instrument use increases the sensitivity of people’s finger tips.
Practice orgasmic meditation enough, without undoing the good work by using a vibrator in between and I believe that it may actually allow almost any women to reach orgasm via penetration. I haven’t been able to test this theory yet, but I am seriously intent on finding out!
John.
Yuppie – interesting and thoughtful article – as always, thanks John for writing it – and for writing again. :)
This “orgasmic meditation” technique does sound to be intriguing and worthy of exploration, but frankly I got cold feet after I finished reading about it the organisation’s website. I understand the underlying principle is focusing on awareness and communication via touch (which is intensely powerful and no vibrator can substitute!) but at the end of the day the receiver is naked from the waist down – labeling that as “meditation” instead of “massage” is slightly misleading. Then there are statements such as “Like Vitamin C, Orgasm is a nutrient that has been missing from the standard human diet for centuries” or “”journey into the 4th dimension (…)magical world of orgasm alchemy” are just a little bit too much pseudoscience or BS for me to swallow to be frank. LOL –just imagine- if orgasm were the 4th dimension (which it is not – it is spacetime) University physics departments would be much more interesting places to work at :) And then there is the merchandise on their website: T-shirts with slogans “Penetrate” for ladies, and “Pussy knows” for men. Really? Who would actually wear a T-shirt with the slogan “Penetrate”? Special pillows, special bags etc etc..
At the end of the day I am lost on where can one actually learn this technique without being exposed to the add-on marketing and pseudoscience that seems to be communicated from this organisation’s website –which is frustrating as I think learning the technique seems to be well worthy of time and effort..